Feeling down in the dumps about your weight and  just want to be accepted for who you are?  Your not alone in fact the dirty little secret is a lot of people feel that way, even skinny people!

There are at least 4 coping skills that plus size people have learned to deal with their self imposed self loathing.

1. Shy Type – This is the person that keeps their head down wherever they go never feeling comfortable in public places.
2. Obnoxious Type – This person walks around with a nasty disposition daring anyone to look at them so they can say “What are you looking at?” or “If you don’t like what you see then stop looking!”.  Polar opposite of example 1.
3. Overly Nice Type – Dealing with their low self esteem by faking nice to everyone. He/she seems to think that if they can be really really nice then everyone will like them.
4. These are the creatures that are so mysterious and so amazing that they seem to defy gravity itself and they are the focus of this post.

I use to play music with a lot of the local musicians off and on during my twenties and there was one musician who we will call Joe.  Now Joe was big fat guy who his friends called  “round man” but besides being round he was also not that attractive. In spite of all of this he still was surrounded by pretty women who just seemed to adore him as a matter of fact he even married a beautiful lady and for the life of me I could not understand how he did it.  He seemed to fly in the face of every socially acceptable image taught to me in the hallways of  high school or on my favorite Hollywood sitcom.

After being around Joe for quite some time I figured it out. Joe was confident in who he was! He was so at home in his own skin that what other people thought of him just did not play a significant role in how he felt about himself. He was never shy,  he was never obnoxious and defensive nor was he overly nice, he just was who he was.

Since that time I have applied the same principle in my life and I can say without a doubt it has helped me live a much happier life.  So just be who you are and learn to be comfortable in your own skin and people will automatically be drawn to you,  your person and they will wonder what your secret is!

Bobby G. Keith